Jesus visits Tebow, Broncos on 'SNL'

Jesus visited Tim Tebow and the Denver Broncos locker room on "SNL."

Turns out God is on Tim Tebow's side after all. At least, according to "Saturday Night Live."

In a sketch on Saturday's show, Jesus (Jason Sudeikis) shows up in the locker room of the Denver Broncos to take credit for their six-game win streak (snapped by the New England Patriots a day after the episode aired).

Quarterback Tebow (Taran Killam) is thrilled that God's son is paying him a visit, so much so that Jesus has to keep warning the famously religious player to keep his distance, using the language of 1950s Catholic school nuns chaperoning a school dance. "Leave some room for the Holy Ghost," he scolds a too-close Tebow.

Jesus 'fesses up to saving the Broncos game after game, saying he only assists in the fourth quarter. He suggests that Tebow cut back on the pre-game praying and Bible reading and increase his stretching and playbook study. "I could throw better, and I'm 2010 years old," he chides the QB. But he isn't all negative about Tebow: "Tim's doing his best, Dad bless 'em," he says.

Jesus then finds out the Patriots are the Broncos' next opponent, and all but backs off on helping them with that game. "If I'm the Son of God, Tom Brady's gotta be the guy's nephew," he says, later comparing New England coach Bill Belichick to the devil.

Oh, and on his way out, Jesus has one more revelation. Let's just say the Osmonds are right.

Watch the sketch below.

 

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This is extremely funny and points out the real reason for denver's success; the kicker, o-line and defense. (and I can't forget mcgahee!!)

"3 for 16! C'mon! I can throw better than that and I'm 2,010 years old" HAHAHAHA!

  • 5 votes
Reply#1 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 11:54 AM EST

I enjoyed the skit and the fact it makes Pat Robertson crazy makes it even better. Pat states if it had been about Muslims there would be bombs going off, but SNL has done MANY skits about muslims... no bombs.. just laughts.... The one they did on Khadafi after he was killed was Ha Larious.

  • 6 votes
#1.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:46 AM EST

I am Christian, and I did not have any problems with the skit. (other than it was marginally funny)

Can't we show we're Christians by our love? Do we have to have no sense of humor? The world can be a difficult place, why not sit back and smile every once and a while.

  • 1 vote
#1.2 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:25 PM EST

Tebow himself has said that "God does not care who wins the game". He is thanking God for giving him the ability and success when they score a touchdown. Christian sales guys may say a prayer in the car after they have landed a new account. A Christian Realtor may say a prayer after they got a new listing. There is nothing unusual about what Tebow is doing in the eyes of a Christian. Muslims pray 5 times a day. Good for them. Why is this so different?

The guy is 23. He is going to win some, he is going to lose some. In Chicago, we have a QB called Caleb Hanie, that makes Tebow look like Joe Namath, Fran Tarkenton, Tom Brady, and the entire Manning clan morphed into one. The media hate Christians so much, they find it hard to be truly objective about his skills. Denver is not as good as the Patriots on either side of the ball. Denver is a far better team this year than last and are in a good position to make the playoffs after a multi year hiatus. Will they win the Super Bowl? Probably not, but that does not make Tebow less of a person.

I have not watched SNL for 25 years, because it is not very funny. Jay Leno, Chelsea Handler, and Conan put on better shows each night than these guys do when they have a week to come up with a show.

As the liberals and mainstream media continue to show their unvarnished hatred and bigotry of Christians, we are just changing the channel.

  • 1 vote
#1.3 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:30 PM EST

A few points, it's true that if SNL had done a skit and it was Mohammed (not just your typical, run of the mill muslim here) doing what they had Jesus doing there would be riots, gaurantee it. There could be arguments made from both perspectives. Muslims have tremendous reverence for their prophet and his edicts. They'll defend it with fervor. Reverence is a good thing. From another perspective, do we really want religious folks being so zealous about their faith that they riot at any indication of it being mocked? Humility and grace are good as well.

I would also like to point out that most Christains traditions understand that God is very capable of defending Himself and that is why a Christian is less likely to riot and "throwing off bombs." Not that Muslims do not believe in the power of Allah, but their religion requires more from them than the Christain faith does. Islam leans more towards a works based salvation were as Christianity leans towards grace for salvation.

  • 1 vote
#1.4 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:32 PM EST

Pat Robertson has his panties in a twist. I guess he doesn't realize that God created humor too, and is quite big enough to take a little satire. He's also big enough to protect himself, so I don't think he needs self-appointed knights in slimy armor riding up to his aid.

He's right about the difference between Islam and Christianity, though. I may never figure out why they feel they have to use violence to protect the image of their profit. If someone burned a bible, I would probably feel offended, but the Word is with God, and the Word is God, not some collection of pages bound together. It's a book, that's all, and there's plenty more where they came from.

All in all, I thought the skit was funny, if (as with most SNL skits) it had some parts that were in bad taste.

Get over it Pat; I'm sure Jesus already has.

  • 1 vote
#1.5 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:41 PM EST
Reply

I wonder if God appreciates being mocked. I haven't watched Saturday night live for years, but in watching this sketch I can see how out of whack an understanding of what it means to be a Christian can be. Tim Tebow, whatever his football successes may or may not be, has won the game of life. SNL -well, whatever.

  • 4 votes
Reply#2 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 12:11 PM EST

Well, judging by Texas' lack of rain this summer, even after the prayer event, i would say your god does not like to be told what to do. So i guess he wont like you telling him how to feel.

and tebow lost, BY A LOT!!

  • 14 votes
#2.1 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 12:17 PM EST

No, the DENVER BRONCOS LOST. Football is a TEAM sport.

It's the hyperactive media that's causing all the UNNECESSARY stink about Tebow & his religion. "Oh look, a NFL Quarterback giving thanks to God. How dare he! That's totally unprofessional & it is our obligation to bash him good-damn Christian goody goody!"

  • 4 votes
#2.2 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:36 PM EST

Well said! The message presented by the main stream media & also SNL's "skit" is a crystal clear one;

Endzone antics of slam dunks, chest bumps, shuffles, dance routines are FAR less offensive than someone kneeling silently on the sidelines giving thanks to his God. I reiterate, let's see these cowards make fun of Muslims & their religion. Don't hold your breath.

  • 5 votes
#2.3 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:48 PM EST

bloodstone

In case you didn't know, the reason some people are tired of Tebow's religiosity isn't because he kneels and prays during games, it's because he and his mom paid for an anti-choice ad in last year's Super Bowl.

And by the way, very poor analogy, a slam dunk or a chest bump is not pretending to give you the answers to the universe.

  • 8 votes
#2.4 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 5:42 PM EST

Found this in a related article... We should watch what we vote for, or we may not need to move to the middle east to encounter religious oppression. History shows that theocracies are violent and oppressive no matter what kind of hats the leaders are wearing:

"There's an anti-Christian bigotry that is just disgusting," said Robertson on CBN, the Christian Broadcasting Network. “If this had been a Muslim country and they had done that, and had Muhammad doing that stuff, you would have found bombs being thrown off ... and bodies in the street. And we think it's OK."

  • 4 votes
#2.5 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:36 AM EST

I haven't watched SNL for years because I couldn't stand their skits on homosexuals. They made me sick. SNL promotes the stupidest things and guess who loves it. Yep, the sinner! However, it's not only SNL that mocks Christianity and the Biblical teachings, it is spread across our country. Our country will pay and pay dearly for this. Now you can laugh and make fun of me but beware be very aware. Time is short and then you will be begging God to make things right. However and then again, your right just doesn't match with God's so again I must repeat 'be aware' and I might add be scared. How long do you think it will be before God asks is there ten in your city. If you don't understand what I'm saying, just look in one of those funny little books (normally black) that has 'Holy Bible' on the front. God isn't playing a game where everyone is going to come out okay. Your choice: live or die, laugh or cry, Heaven or Hell. I hope you chose to live in Heaven with Jesus and His Bride. Fear, if you do not chose God then you will live in Hell with satan and his SNL'rs. Don't blame me, you have a choice. While you are alive, you have a choice or should I say a 'Chance'! God Bless You! I hope to see you in Heaven! God Loves You! Don't forget that!

  • 2 votes
#2.6 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:14 PM EST

CogitoErgo, I get what you're saying with your modified quote. I was thinking that when I was listening to the two of them. Are they saying we should be "throwing off bombs," because Jesus was mocked (or not; haven't seen the skit)? Does Pat think Christains should be reacting as a Muslim would if their profit was mocked? If not, I don't get the comparison and it seems silly to even bring it up. That's Pat for you though.

    #2.7 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:40 PM EST
    Reply

    Which brings us back to the joke: it's about 40 years into the future and Peyton Manning is entering the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter says to him "For all your good deeds you have done with your life we are going to let you choose your own place of residence." Manning sees a home painted red, white and blue with the New England Patriots logo and number 12 painted on either side of the house. Manning says "I want a house just like Tom Brady but in Colts colors with my number 18 painted on it." St Peter replies "That's not Tom Brady's house, that is God's house."

    • 5 votes
    Reply#3 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 12:26 PM EST

    So everything about the Mormon faith is true? The Mormon faith claims Satan is the brother of Jesus, diametrically opposing the biblical description of Jesus; "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son" John 3:16.

    Just had to throw that comment in at the end without rebuttal. Cowards!!!!

      Reply#4 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:05 PM EST

      Sorry, I just saw your post. If you are going to quote the Bible, you should at least get it right. The verse you are attempting to justify this non-sense with is " For God so loved the world that he gave his only BEGOTTEN son. That is to say, the only son he sired Himself! Jesus said that we are ALL Gods children, good AND bad!

      That being said, Christians need to get over themselves. God said he created us humans in His image, so it satnds to reason that if we have sense of humor, so does God! I personally thought it was hilarius! I thought it was espesially funny that in the skit, Jesus said he could not be there for Tebow during the Patriot game, and then Denver loses on Sunday!

      • 1 vote
      #4.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 12:09 PM EST
      Reply

      Am I the only one that's tired of hearing about Tim Tebow? He's like a Kardashian that throws far.

      • 11 votes
      Reply#6 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:19 PM EST

      I love this comment. And really, his accuracy stinks... so... he's pretty much as useful as a Kardashian. My issue with the man has nothing to do with his God-love - to each his own - I'm just tired of hearing about him. Seriously. I'm a Dolphins fan, so while it is against my nature to root for New England - yesterday we were cheering in my house! :-p

      • 1 vote
      #6.1 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 9:14 PM EST

      He's only popular because he is an outspoken Christian. To conservative religious America, that's all that matters. It doesn't matter how incompetent you are in your job, as long as you are a practicing Christian (and constantly rubbing everyone else's face in it), that's all that counts. It's how they view teachers, politicians, and now athletes as well, apparently.

      • 7 votes
      #6.2 - Tue Dec 20, 2011 1:24 AM EST

      Please, he’s popular because "all he does is win". The guy is a rookie, who
      took over the starting position and won a bunch of close scoring games. Stop
      with the whining he's a "practicing Christian (and constantly rubbing
      everyone else's face in it)". He believes what he believes so why should
      you care? I think it’s refreshing to see someone who stands by his convictions
      and doesn’t care what other people think; it shows a lot of character.

        #6.3 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:28 PM EST
        Reply

        WHAT A SHOCK! SNL Making fun of Jesus Christ and Christians! I guess, end zone antics of shuffles, bowling, golf or what-have-you are FAR more acceptable than a man silently giving thanks to his creator. The way some of these haters are carrying on, you'd think Tebow was on the 50 yard line with a microphone in his hand. Btw you bunch of pussies at SNL, why don't you grow a set & try making fun of Muhammad, Allah & Muslims? Because your lives wouldn't be worth spit & you know it.

        • 3 votes
        Reply#7 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:29 PM EST

        Silently giving thanks to his creator? Silently? Way to completely not know anything about the topic you are commenting about.

        • 8 votes
        #7.1 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 4:28 PM EST
        Reply

        ....the entire time Tim was praying on the sidelines, I had been wondering what other games Jesus was watching. Now I know, the Patriots.

        • 2 votes
        Reply#8 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:37 PM EST

        Bloodstone, it is very offensive to me that Tebow would have the audacity to think that god would pay any attention to his little football game. Doesn't the bible say "pray in your house, alone" because anyone who prays in public is just a faker? But I forgot - you xians just pick and choose whichever passages in the bible you like and ignore the inconvient ones (like rich men don't get into heaven). Doesn't Tebow realize that god is way too busy starving little children to death in Somalia to waste time helping him throw a football? god is a busy man, donchaknow?

        • 5 votes
        Reply#9 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:59 PM EST

        But I forgot - you xians just pick and choose whichever passages in the bible you like and ignore the inconvient ones (like rich men don't get into heaven).

        To many christians, the bible is like a software licensing agreement. They don't read it, they just scroll to the bottom and click "I Agree".

        • 11 votes
        #9.1 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 9:13 PM EST

        Why do you get to be offended but I apparently do not have that right? I am deeply offended by your ridiculous assertions, particularly your BS quip about God starving little children. God doesn't starve children, their leaders who would take the supplies for themselves do a good enough job of that...learn of that which you are speaking. No, I don't believe God pays particular attention to football games, but He DOES pay attention to the lives of those who are His. Tim Tebow KNOWS there are more talented players and he believes he has been put where he is for the sole reason of glorifying his Creator. How is that offensive? Maybe you have been hurt by Christians in the past and since we are all human, sometimes that happens but that is not a reflection on Jesus. Perhaps you ought to attempt to actually read the Bible instead of just spouting remarks you've heard others say...like Christians pick and choose. Yes, some do, that I will grant you, but most people who have met the living Christ DO study the Bible so we understand the WHOLE plan and are just trying to make the world a little better place. Maybe they don't do such a good job sometimes, but then, neither do mockers. I've always appreciated the joke where one person says to another "I wonder why God hasn't done anything about suffering in the world" and the other person asks "What are YOU doing about it." Personally, I don't see what is so offensive about a young man who loves the Lord saying so...maybe you prefer the ones who beat their wives or shoot themselves or someone else or get busted doing drugs. He does wear his religion on his sleeve, but he at least walks the talk. He works with many charities and he truly believes he is spreading the best news ever given. How is that so offensive? The SNL skit: funny but probably in poor taste-so what else is new?

          #9.2 - Tue Dec 20, 2011 2:26 PM EST

          One of the many BIGOTS is more like it.

            #9.3 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:13 AM EST
            Reply

            And dynatoy, I think you totally missed the joke. Bet you are lots of fun at a party! You and Bloodstone ought to hang out more - your combined rightousness could power all the lights in a small city or town.

            • 4 votes
            Reply#10 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 3:02 PM EST

            Hahaaha OneOfTheMany I got YOUR joke! Quite the comedian! Ever thought about writing for SNL? Or are you too busy bashing people?

            • 1 vote
            Reply#11 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 3:36 PM EST

            I heard Tebow singing something about his god being an awesome god - off key and horribly. So, not so silent. And what is it with the evangelical songs. At least when I was singing with the Methodist Choir at First Church in Santa Monica some 40+ years ago, we would come thundering down with "A Mighty Fortress Is Our Lord". What a sound - a wall of sound that was so much fun that this Jewish kid loved singing in the choir because of the amazing music the Methodists used: Handel, Bach.

            And this our god being so awesome, leaves room for other gods, eh? Maybe more awesome and maybe a Pats fan.

            • 1 vote
            Reply#12 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 5:53 PM EST

            Tebow doesn't pray for God to help him win games. He's praying for God to help him do his personal best. Then, because he is a Christian, he thanks God afterwards for any good things that he (Tebow) was able to do in the game.

            I think the SNL skit was funny and not blasphemous towards Jesus. For those who believed God created teh world, then you also have to believe that God has a sense of humor, as He created humor. I believe that Jesus probably even enjoys some of the South Park parodies of Him.

            • 4 votes
            Reply#13 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 6:08 PM EST

            I can only imagine (as I have not seen the clip) that some of it was in bad taste but why does Pat have to been so aggressive about it? If he had to make a comment on it at all why couldn't he have just said, "well some of it was in bad taste but at the end of the day it doesn't really matter.

              #13.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:57 PM EST
              Reply

              Do any of you Tebow-bashers know why you haven't seen him do commercials? He turns them down. He doesn't want the attention. Believe it.

              • 2 votes
              Reply#14 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 9:50 PM EST

              but he DID do a commercial, during the superbowl, telling people to IGNORE medical advice and take a MAJOR risk (1 in 1000 surviving) to have their own 'tebow'. I wonder how many motherless families that commercial has created?

              He should do MORE commercials as a meat-headed religious football player and LESS commercials giving 'advice' in a field he knows NOTHING about and requires intense higher learning and has provided incalculable success (compared to what was practiced before modern medicine)

              • 3 votes
              #14.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:04 AM EST
              Reply

              Funny stuff!

                Reply#15 - Mon Dec 19, 2011 10:34 PM EST

                Hmm, I wonder what would happen if a Muslim athlete bowed down and prayed to Muhammad during a game. Would all you Christians and Tebow defenders accept and support that? Or would you criticize and ridicule him? So accept the fact that not everyone is going to agree with Tebow's religion or his goofy public display of it, either.

                • 7 votes
                Reply#16 - Tue Dec 20, 2011 1:20 AM EST

                I would accept it because he is an individual and respect his right to do it.
                People have no right to ridicule someone for their beliefs no matter what it
                is. If he's going to do this on the field make it quick so the game can
                continue. If there on the sidelines take as long as you want.

                  #16.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 2:14 PM EST
                  Reply

                  JerseyJ9, when was Tebow ever 3-16??? Why is it ALWAYS okay to rip white people, whether it's in a comedy way or in a serious way, but NEVER okay to rip black people in the same manner?? Tebow is a great kid, both on the field and off the field, but most people attack him like he's a ghetto street thug, why is that? Kobe Bryant and Tiger Woods are both "cheats" and "con-men", but are worshipped on an hourly basis. Why is that? This country is so screwed up, and it's going downhill very fast.

                  • 1 vote
                  Reply#17 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:15 AM EST

                  you think i'm black?? BAHAHA, i am irish and english i couldn't get any whiter if i tried! You can see my guts working through my skin (not literally) LOL.

                  I dont even know what or why you went there or how to comment. I dont 'worship' anyone or anything, and i definately dont think of sports figures as anything more than athletes. They are NOT doctors or scientists or psychologists or authorities on ANYTHING, except the specific sport they play, and that's it.

                  and if you actually listened to the skit, i was quoting it!

                  • 1 vote
                  #17.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:17 AM EST

                  JerseyJ9, I didn't say or imply that you were black or you worship anyone. I was just saying, in general, people worship ghetto street thugs, and hate good guys. Why is that?

                    #17.2 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:34 PM EST
                    Reply

                    I am going to solve the whole problem for Robertson and his followers, Don't Watch It.

                    • 2 votes
                    Reply#18 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:26 AM EST

                    Yes, but Pat needs to dictate what's acceptable for all you heathens as well. He has to fill his show with some content. What would he do if it weren't railing against secularism? Oh, I know, preach the Good News.

                      #18.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 2:04 PM EST
                      Reply

                      The skit had humor. And it would also have had humor if Islam was the joke instead of Christianity.

                      The only difference is that there would be more people offended if Islam was being joked about.

                      I mean seriously. If a bunch of right-wing Christians made fun of Islam that way... everyone would call them hateful and racist.

                      • 1 vote
                      Reply#19 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:36 AM EST

                      If Islam or blacks were the joke, there would have been "hell" to pay. A person can't even make a negative true statement about a black without being called ignorant and racist. Give me a break, it happens all the time.

                        #19.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:37 PM EST
                        Reply

                        How could anyone think that these Jesus freaks are good people.

                        They are all filled with hate. If your not a white christian male you are no body to them

                        • 1 vote
                        Reply#20 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:50 AM EST

                        What ??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                        • 1 vote
                        #20.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:38 PM EST
                        Reply

                        This is too funny! If we can't enjoy a good laugh, then what is it all about. I loved the line about Mormons and the looks on the guys faces when it was said.... HAHAHA.

                        Being in Utah gives you a since of humor about the stupidity that religion can be. Any mormon jokes are good jokes!

                          Reply#21 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:02 AM EST

                          As a lifelong Chargers fan, I actually hope Tebow's Broncos lose another game or two. :-)

                          But here's the thing: Everyone who's ever met the guy says Tim Tebow is as genuine as they come. Down-to-earth, humble, gives a lot of his time to cancer patients, etc. And we're gonna pick on him because he openly displays his faith??? Serriously???

                          The national sports media treated Michael Vick like a martyr after he got out of prison, and he tortured, maimed and killed innocent animals FOR SIX YEARS just for self-satisfaction. Why is it that we want our athletes to be wife-beaters, drunk drivers, and animal killers??? Why are we so hard on a good guy who just happens to be a very devout Christian???

                          As far as the SNL skit itself, I don't really have any problems with it. God has a sense of humor, or He wouldn't have given us one.

                          • 3 votes
                          Reply#22 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:03 AM EST

                          Very nicely put. My son is a Charger fan too, so I hope they make the playoffs, but I think Tebow is great, on and off the field.

                            #22.1 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:40 PM EST
                            Reply

                            I'm not a Christian, and I also found the skit quite disgusting all the way around!!

                            • 1 vote
                            Reply#23 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:08 AM EST

                            Mr. Robertson (and anyone else who got their panties in a bunch over Tebow or SNL), three little words ... Freedom of Speech.

                            The old saying still holds true. I may not agree with what you're saying, but I'll defend with my life your right to say it.

                              Reply#24 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:13 AM EST

                              I think God and Jesus probably had a laugh also. We're always so quick to criticize as seems America is becoming both more intolerant (everyone whines about everything) and also purposely making a scene or saying outrageous things to get attention.

                              Like the post above says - if you don't like it, you don't have to watch; it's that "American" freedom of choice thing. And the other post about Tebow "in your face" - I haven't seen any commercial with Tebow ramming his Christianity down my throat; just one Super Bowl ad (one - but it's all anyone references) but everything else is from interviews, that's the media propogating the image for a story.

                              Other than that - grow a pair guys, seriously. I think I hear Jesus laughing...

                                Reply#25 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:35 AM EST

                                I'm a Christian; also a fan of Tim Tebow (who is free to express his faith anywhere he wants to...thank God and the Constitution of the U.S.). But....anything that gives Pat Robertson gas is OK by me. The man has made a fortune pretending to read the mind of God and foisting that pretense off on desperate people. Let's "pretend" there's a special place reserved in Hell for people who trade in dollars off the name of God, Pat!

                                • 1 vote
                                Reply#26 - Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:48 AM EST
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