The general consensus is that Mitt Romney cleaned Barack Obama’s clock in Wednesday’s debate. Even Chris Matthews at MSNBC sounded forlorn at his performance. But surely the president could expect some kind words from Jon Stewart on “The Daily Show,” right?
Not so much.
“There is no Red America there is no Blue America there is only the America that can’t believe how bad this guy did in the debate,” Stewart said. Later, he added “Even Osama bin Laden from the bottom of his watery grave watched and thought, ‘That’s the guy that killed me? Really? Mr. Look-Down-at-the-Paper-All-Night shot me in the face?”
Actually it was SEAL Team 6, but point taken.
It didn’t even matter that Romney told moderator Jim Leher that he’d cut funding for PBS, even if that move might leave Big Bird without a job.
“He could have waterboarded Aladdin, put down Blue, deported Dora the Explorer and still won walking away,” Stewart said.
It didn’t look like the president wanted to be there, spending a lot of time looking at his papers like a man in a hurry to go celebrate his wedding anniversary. But again, no sympathy.
“Mr. President, everyone has parts of their jobs that they don’t like as much, but they still have to do those things if they want to keep those jobs,” Stewart said.
More sparks might have been expected to fly when Bill O’Reilly showed up, since the two are debating on Saturday at George Washington University. But O’Reilly was mostly there to sell his book, and it’s not like Stewart wanted to turn the topic to the presidential debate. But the Fox News host did have a theory for what happened.
“I think Mr. Obama is so far ahead that he just wanted to keep it exciting,” O’Reilly said.
“He’s redistributing his lead?” Stewart asked.
“That’s right,” O’Reilly said.
If Stewart was down in the mouth, Stephen Colbert was dancing in the aisles. Literally. He shimmied to the stage from high up in the crowd, exultant in the performance of Romney.
“Folks, it is a whole new horse race! Mitt smoked Obama! Metaphorically of course -- Mormons can’t smoke,” Colbert said. “(Obama) hasn’t done this poorly since he debated Clint Eastwood.”
As for the charges that Romney embellished the facts while making his points against the President?
“Oh no! Mitt could lose the fact checking race!” Colbert said. “Quick, some fact checker should research the amount of electoral votes that Factchecksylvania has.”
Meanwhile, over on "Late Night," host Jimmy Fallon channeled his inner Mitt Romney for a reenactment of the big event against a stand-in Obama. But unlike Stewart and Colbert, Fallon didn't care which of the candidates actually won or lost the debate. The real loser in his skit was moderator Jim Leher.
"I wish you'd just shut your yapper a little bit," Fallon-as-Romney told a bumbling faux-Leher. "We don't need you."
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