• Bill Clinton talks Romney's 'Whack-A-Mole' methods on 'Daily Show'

    By NBC News staff

    Comedy Central

    Jon Stewart closed his week with a big name on “The Daily Show,” using the final two segments to interview former president Bill Clinton.

    Clinton was more subdued than he was at the Democratic National Convention, when he energized an audience with his extended defense of President Barack Obama and his criticisms of Republican nominee Mitt Romney and the Republicans. Loud though the “Daily Show” audience is, it’s not like the convention. Plus there were no balloons or confetti. But Clinton obviously remains proud of what he said there, and focused on getting Democrats to the polls.

    “I think the American people take this election seriously,” Clinton said. “They know they have to make choices that will affect their lives, and it’s not very helpful if you take up their time and don’t tell them what their choices are, and that’s what I tried to do.”

    Clinton noted that Romney has had to tack to the right, whether because of a change in his political philosophy or as a way to get elected. “Part of the problem that he has is that he made all these commitments in the Primary campaign, and they just kept pushing everyone to the right. Every week another candidate came up and it was like Whack-A-Mole, he had to knock them down.”


    But now the big problem Romney has, according to Clinton, is his lack of specificity on key details.

    “If I come to you and I say we have this terrible national debt, and here’s my opening gambit -- the first thing I’m going to do is raise it by another $5 trillion over a decade by doing another round of tax cuts that mostly benefit the people who benefitted over the past decade even though it didn’t produce jobs. Now we’re in a really deep hole, now let me tell you how I’m gonna get out of it. Well what about the details? See me after the election,” Clinton imitated.

    Yeah, when you put it that way, it’s not very convincing.

    Before moving on to talk about the Clinton Global Initiative, he closed with a plea to move from ideology to practicality.

    “This is a practical country. We have ideals. We have philosophies. But the problem with any ideology is that it gives the answer before you look at the evidence, so you have to mold the evidence to fit the answer you’ve already decided you’ve got to have.”

    Elsewhere in late night, the focus stayed on Romney.

    David Letterman addressed the candidate's claim that the “Late Show” host doesn’t like him because he has appeared on the “Tonight Show” with Jay Leno. On the contrary, said a peeved Letterman, who insisted that the Republican presidential candidate, and his “little buddy Gilligan” – aka vice presidential nominee Rep. Paul Ryan -- have an open invitation to visit the show anytime.

    “The man is delusional,” Letterman said. “If he thinks we hate him … We are not in the hate business. We are here looking to make friends. … Now, Mitt Romney has been on the show many, many times. Let me ask you something, Mitt. If we hated you, why do we keep begging you to be on the show? 

    “Let me go out on a limb here and say … Mitt Romney or his little buddy, the vice president, who’s the little guy (referring to Paul Ryan) … Gilligan, his little buddy Gilligan … they have an open invitation to be on the show anytime, on short notice. You want to be here tomorrow? Fine. You want to be here Monday? Anytime, I don’t care. Bring in Mitt Romney, bring in Paul Ryan, bring in Mitt and Mrs. Mitt, bring in the kids … bring in everybody. We don’t hate you, Mitt! We don’t hate people!”

    Meanwhile, on "Late Night With Jimmy Fallon," Fallon channeled his inner-Romney to give viewers a glimpse at just how hip the Republican presidential candidate might look like if he addressed the Internet directly.

    Proving that he's a "cool, down-to-Earth, normal dude person," Fallon's Romney put together a Rom Bomb Video Vlog Blog and smoothed over his recent "slip-up."

    "When I said that 47 percent of folks are dependent on government and believe that they're entitled to food, healthcare and housing, I was just joshing! Hahahaha!"

    Then, keeping with the cool-cat stuff, Fallon-as-Romney showed off a picture of his grandkids all dressed up in gingham -- which was the perfect moment to show off his "Gingham Style" moves.

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  • Jon Stewart rants about 'Romney campaign headquarters,' aka Fox News

    Comedy Central

    Jon Stewart finds the Fox News coverage on Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney hard to swallow.

    By Craig Berman, NBC News contributor

    If the Mitt Romney campaign hoped the leaked video of his ill-considered remarks at a May fundraiser would be a one-night story … well, it was mistaken. But Fox News came away with as many woes as the candidate when Jon Stewart was done with his “Daily Show” monologue Wednesday night.

    The tape of Romney dismissing those who receive Federal subsidies as being unworthy of his attention was the gift that keeps on giving for Stewart, who rarely misses the chance to point out political ridiculousness when he sees it. The “entitlement” debate, dismissing 47% of voters as moochers, was right up his ally.

    “Entitled to food! Medicine! Roofs!” Stewart said, feigning outrage at those who would dare to hope for such luxuries. “That’s the Republican candidate for the presidency seemingly characterizing a broad swath of Americans which would include veterans, the elderly, the working poor and much of the middle class as a bunch of freeloaders.”

    But Stewart saved much of his venom for Fox News, which he called both the “Romney campaign headquarters” and an impolite term for a mountain filled with the waste products of a male bovine -- ahem. Examining the “fair and balanced” spin coming from the network’s ranks, Stewart noted that Fox first tried to dismiss the video because it came from the liberal Mother Jones magazine, via Jimmy Carter’s grandson.

    (Warning: The following clip contains some profanity.)

    “Oh my God! Your campaign got blown out by Jimmy Carter’s grandson! Oh, the Habitat for Humanity,” Stewart said. “So word one from (expletive) Mountain is well yeah, he said it, but you only found out about it because of people we don’t like.”


    That was only part of the Republican response, of course. The spin took some other turns, with some arguing that Romney was speaking truth, though not artfully, and further indicating it was a strategy that could win him the election.

    “Let me sum up the message, if I may,” Stewart said. “This inartfully stated dirty liberal smear … is a truthful expression of Mitt Romney’s political philosophy, and it is a winner.”

    That wasn’t all. He also noted the folks at Fox  minimized the video because it was a distraction from the big issues people theoretically care more about and because of when it was taken … in May of this year.

    “May! Oh, that sounds like before June. Who even remembers May?” Stewart said. “Grandfather, may I sit on your knee and hear you tell tales of what life was like way back in May?’”

    If you followed the news, you know what happens next. A video of Obama talking about the redistribution of wealth was located and played, with all the usual commentary about how damaging it was. Of course, it was taken in 1998. When he was a State Senator from Illinois.

    (Warning: The following clip contains some profanity.)

    “So recorded videos are a distraction – here’s one on Obama,” Stewart said.

    And then came the big finish.

    “The biggest problems with the denizens of (expletive) Mountain is… If they had success they built it. If they failed, the government ruined it for them. If they get a break they deserve it. If you get a break, it’s a handout and an entitlement. It’s a baffling, willfully blind cognitive dissonance.”

    Looks like he gave Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly some bulletin board material for when the two debate in October.

     

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  • Romney's '47 percent' tape is comedy gold for Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert

    By Craig Berman, NBC News contributor

    Comedy Central

    As you might have expected, the release of tape from a Mitt Romney fundraising talk where the Republican candidate for president said that 47 percent of the population paid no income taxes and would never vote for him proved to be a gift to the late night talk show circuit.

    “Finally a candidate with the courage to say half of all Americans are freeloaders who believe they are entitled to food!” said Steven Colbert on "The Colbert Report." “We job creators know that there is no such thing as a free lunch. Lunch is $50,000 a plate” – the cost of the fundraiser Romney was speaking at.

    Jon Stewart aired the video footage on "The Daily Show," and then a clip taken decades earlier when Romney’s mother talked about his dad’s rise to political prominence -- which began after he was on welfare relief as a boy.

    “George Romney was on welfare,” Stewart noted. “So according to Mitt Romney’s own logic, Mitt Romney could not win the vote of his dad.”

    That wasn’t the only gift that kept on giving to the comedians. On the tape, Romney also said he’d have a better chance of winning if he were Latino, and warned that “if the Hispanic voting block becomes as committed to the Democrats as the African American vote has in the past we’re in trouble as a party and I think as a nation”

    So in one fell swoop, Romney managed to diss 47 percent of the population, and added the Latino community for good measure -- which left Stewart wondering.

    “This is a guy whose religion forbids him from drinking alcohol. Can you imagine what he would say if he were (drunk?)”

    Ironically, this flap came right after the Romney campaign undertook a well-publicized reboot to distract from some of the candidate’s other missteps, including his controversial comments after the recent violence in Libya.


    ”You always reintroduce a candidate three weeks after the convention,” Stewart said. “It’s like telling a girl, ‘please go on a seventh date with me. I’ll grow on you.’”

    “I’m happy to say that by last night nobody was focused on Libyans anymore!” Colbert added. He aired several news clips that described the Romney campaign as being shaken by the video release, but looked on the bright side. “Shaken to say the least. Vomiting blood to say the most. But no Libya!”

    Living under a fatwa

    Stewart sat down for a brief interview with Salman Rushdie, who famously was the subject of a fatwa and death threats following his release of “The Satanic Verses.” He recently released the autobiographical “Joseph Anton: A Memoir,” and discussed the experience of living under threat and what it was like to find out the news.

    “I was sitting at home and I got a call from the BBC. The phone rings and this woman says to me, ‘how does it feel to know you’ve been sentenced to death by the Ayatollah Khomeini? I thought ‘good question.’”

    Rushdie acknowledged the comparison to the man behind the YouTube film clips that caused much damage in the Middle East recently, with one major difference:  “That guy’s an (expletive).”

    “We have to defend his right to free speech. But that doesn’t mean we have to not say he’s a jerk,” Rushdie said. “Even jerks have the right to free speech, but they’re still jerks. He did something clearly in order to incite a response, and the sad thing is that he got exactly the response he was trying to incite, only in spades, just like both sides have collaborated to create this calamity.”

     

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  • Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart react to bloodshed over 'dumb Internet video'

    Comedy Central

    Stephen Colbert.

    By Craig Berman, NBC News contributor

    After a week where events in the Middle East took the global spotlight again without the commentary of the Comedy Central duo, things got back to normal Monday night with both Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert giving their take on YouTube-video-sparked riots in the region.

    Stewart got right to the point on “The Daily Show.” “Let me get this straight. All of this destruction and bloodshed was over this dumb Internet video made by some (expletive), and promoted by the Koran-burning Florida pastor Terry Jones?” he asked.

    Pretty much.

    Colbert was equally unimpressed. “It combines the productive values of a basement porno, the acting talent of 18th century syphilis sanitariums, and a script transcribed from arguments overheard in a bus station bathroom. It’s not good.”

    But he continued. “Our constitution means we can’t stop people from making movies that are stupid or grossly offensive.  For instance, we made three 'Transformers.' Where were the mobs then? Where were the riots?”

    And Stewart saw parallels to some actions taken by folks closer to home.

    “It’s almost as if certain leaders in that part of the world are deliberately exploiting whatever they can get their hands on to rile up the populace for their own political gain,” he noted. “Hey, wait a minute! They really are getting the hang on this democracy thing.”

    Debate time

    Stewart also confirmed that he’ll be debating Fox News host Bill O’Reilly in Washington on Oct. 6.

    “I’m so scared,” Stewart said mockingly. Then he warned O’Reilly, “I shall meet you in the square for an old fashioned duel of wits.”

    Annan not optimistic

    Stewart interviewed former Secretary General of the United Nations, and more recently U.N.-Arab League envoy to Syria, Kofi Annan. But if anyone was looking for some good news on the international situation, they were sorely disappointed.

    Stewart began by asking, “Let me ask you this, sir … how’s the world?”

    “Messy,” Annan replied.

    Annan didn’t say that the situation in Syria was hopeless, but he does think the world needs to act to prevent a disaster.


    “Syrian’s miscalculation can create a problem that we will not be able to handle,” Annan said. “There is quite a bit (other countries) could do if they could come together to put pressure on the governments in the region to work with them to pressure both sides, and to put a proposal on the table. There has to be a political transition.”

     

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  • Late night hosts say God and Bill Clinton were the real DNC stars

    Comedy Central

    Stephen Colbert.

    By Craig Berman, NBC News contributor

    The late-night talk show hosts were in agreement Thursday night. The stars of the Democratic National Convention were God and Bill Clinton.

    Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert both had fun with the Democrats flip-flopping on the inclusion of the Lord in their political platform.

    “I have faith in a God who’s not too insecure, who doesn’t freak out if you don’t mention his name enough,” Stewart said.

    He also had fun with the process itself, which saw the Democrats conduct a voice vote approving the change multiple times before they got a result that maybe, sorta-kinda sounded somewhat close to being a two-thirds majority -- if you assumed that many "yes" voters were whispering. Surely the reflection of the results on the teleprompter before the vote took place had nothing to do with that decision. Surely.

    “Tie goes to the prompter,” Stewart said. “On the positive side, we finally have found the evidence of Democratic voter fraud that the Republicans are always complaining about.”

    On the other hand, Colbert noted that, “Party platforms always mention the Lord. For Pete’s sake, the Republican platform is just a picture of Jesus with a thought bubble that says ‘Get ‘Er Done.”

    And the “Colbert Report” host warned, “Folks, he’s very sensitive. Read your Bible, he’s got a hair trigger. And of course the Democrats cannot hide what they’ve done from God, because he googles himself constantly.”

    Clinton gets props

    Jay Leno was more focused on Clinton, raving about his prime-time sales pitch for President Obama.

    “Both conventions are probably over and if you watched, I think it’s clear who should be the next President of the United States -- Bill Clinton,” Leno said.

    “Bill Clinton spent 50 minutes praising Barack Obama’s accomplishments as president. Imagine how long he would have talked if they actually liked each other,” the “Tonight Show” host added.


    He also took some jabs at Republican nominee Mitt Romney’s taxes, commenting on the report that hackers claimed to have Romney’s tax records and threatened to release them unless they were paid off. “This is such an unethical money-making scheme that Mitt Romney said he was quite impressed -- ‘I could use these guys at Bain Capital. See if they’re available.’”

    ‘Letter to Santa Claus’

    Stewart also got serious later in “The Daily Show,” interviewing Austan Goolsbee. The University of Chicago professor and former Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisors for Barack Obama had strong feelings on the “are you better off now than you were four years ago?” question.

    “That was about the worst 4-5 months in the economic history of the United States,” Goolsbee said. “The thought that people would like to go back to then when we were losing 800,000 jobs a month is a joke.”

    Goolsbee also noted that contrary to what they advertised, the Republican economic plan is vague to the point of irrelevance. “They keep saying it’s a specific plan. It’s not specific at all. The specifics are like ‘Make America better,’ Goolsbee said.

    “It reads like a letter to Santa Claus,” Stewart agreed.

     

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  • Michelle Obama doesn't watch convention, but tells Letterman everyone else should

    CBS

    First Lady Michelle Obama stressed the importance of watching political conventions during a Wednesday night appearance on "Late Show."

    By Craig Berman, NBC News contributor

    As the Republican National Convention was wrapping up its second night in Tampa, David Letterman turned much of his show over to Michelle Obama. Instead of discussing politics, the two mostly had a conversation about parenting.

    The first lady talked about sending her daughters to sleep-away camp, counseled Letterman on getting his son involved in sports, and explained more about her efforts to improve the health of kids’ diets and ensuring that veterans were able to get jobs after leaving the army. The two also bonded over the great taste of kale chips, so the president can likely expect a big check from the ever-powerful kale lobby.

    Of course, the two couldn’t avoid politics entirely. Eventually, after all the healthy diet options had been discussed, Letterman finally asked the first lady her thoughts on the RNC convention.

    “I, as the wife of the guy they are running against, tend not to watch it, but I think it’s important for everyone to watch these conventions,” she said. “This is the time when you get to know the party, you get to know the platforms, and you get to understand the candidates.”

    She’ll be taking on a starring role soon enough, considering her upcoming speech at the Democratic National Convention. Obama didn’t offer any details about the contents, though Letterman volunteered to send her a joke if she needed one. He also brought up the old story about Mitt Romney’s treatment of his dog on vacation, asking if the Obamas had ever thought about strapping the White House dog to the roof of the car.

    “Only the best for Bo. He’s used to traveling on Air Force One,” she said.

    Maher is Politically Incorrect on Leno

    Jay Leno also went with a political guest, though his was more inclined to roll up his sleeves and engage in some old-fashioned trashing of the other side.

    Bill Maher made no apologies for that combativeness. The ‘Real Time’ host said on the ‘Tonight Show,’ “People say they want clean campaigns. No. They want ‘The Hunger Games.’”

    He offered tepid praise for Ann Romney’s convention speech but had less kind things to say about New Jersey governor Chris Christie, noting that he followed her feel-good speech with some angry rhetoric.

    “Isn’t this emblematic of the Republican Party? A woman says something we all agree with that’s reasonable, and then a meathead white guy comes out and tells her to shut up,” Maher said.

    Maher is not expecting much for Mitt Romney’s speech Thursday (“He has the oratorical skills of the On-Star operator”), and doesn’t expect the pick of Paul Ryan as the Republican vice presidential candidate to make a difference. “If it ever mattered, it would have mattered last time, when the world’s oldest man picked the world’s stupidest woman,” he said.

    And while he’s disappointed in the Democrats, it’s safe to say that the man who gave a million dollars to the Obama campaign won’t be changing sides in 2012.

    “Let’s not forget that the Republican symbol is an ‘R’ because that’s the sound a pirate makes when he robs you,” he said.


    Cain takes ‘Daily Show’ stage

    Jon Stewart took advantage of his place in Tampa to bring on one of the more engaging Republican candidates in Herman Cain, who sought and lost the nomination that Romney received.

    Say this about Cain: He’s never dull. And he’s no Romney, in that he’s willing to put more of his personality out there on display.

    “It’s a difference of style. My style and personality is different from Governor Romney,” Cain said. “I don’t repress my personality at all. What you see is what you get.”

    Stewart also spent a lot of time tearing down the GOP in his comedy bits. Reince Priebus, Chairman of the RNC, didn’t impress Stewart with his remarks early in the convention. “If the tone you were going for was Angry Drunk Guy, you nailed it!” he said.

    Nor was he impressed with the “We Built This!” theme that was evident in Tuesday’s speeches. “When was the last time we heard a catchphrase that was such a peculiar mix of braggadocio and whiny petulance?” he asked.

    The screen then cut to a clip of Charlie Sheen saying his catchphrase: “Yeah, winning!”

    But then again, winning is what this is all about, right?

     

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  • Robert Pattinson gets breakup advice, ice cream from Jon Stewart on 'Daily Show'

    By Ree Hines, TODAY contributor

    Everything is better with ice cream -- kid's parties, hot summer days and "awkward interview situations." That latter tidbit comes courtesy of "Twilight" star Robert Pattinson, who enjoyed some of the frosty stuff while chatting with "Daily Show" host Jon Stewart on Monday night.

    Actually, it was Stewart who did most of the talking while the actor simply did his best to avoid directly addressing anything to do with longtime love Kristen Stewart or her headline-grabbing "momentary indiscretion" with "Snow White and the Huntsman" director Rupert Sanders.

    "What have you been up to?" Stewart asked with a smile, breaking the ice right from the start.

    But even that simple question seemed to throw Pattinson off a bit in his first television interview since the scandal went public.

    "God, I thought we already prepared this. I had a joke prepared!" he insisted. "I was all set up and ready to go."

    That's when Stewart decided it was time to "just do this," and break out the Ben & Jerry's (one pint of Karamel Sutra for Pattinson and one pint of Cherry Garcia for himself).

    Slideshow: Robert Pattinson

    Joel Ryan / AP

    The "Twilight" hunk may have found stardom as a vampire, but his roles have ranged from fantasy prince to Salvador Dali and beyond.

    Launch slideshow

    "Now, we're just a couple of gals talking," said Stewart. "All right, tell me everything."

    Instead of "everything," Pattinson offered up a joke about his waistline, as if he really worried the ice cream might make him "split (his) Spanx." But he wasn't off the hook, as Stewart's questions continued.

    "So what are we doing here? Are you all right?" he asked. "Is everything OK? I'm worried about you, and you're all right?"

    That earned one confession from the star.

    "I'm going to sound like an idiot, but my biggest problem in my life is I'm cheap, and I didn't hire a publicist," Pattinson revealed. "And in every awkward interview, normally, actors get these things scripted. I'm going to hire a publicist."

    "I think you should," Stewart agreed, "although, unless you have a time machine ..."

    Good point. But even a publicist would have had a hard time getting Stewart to avoid the obvious topic.

    "Listen, the last time I had a bad breakup, Ben and Jerry got me through some of the tougher times," the host shared. "So, I thought you and I could bond over this and talk about, 'Boy, you are better off. Kick her to the curb! Whatever!"

    Director David Cronenberg's vision of the near future stars Robert Pattinson as a wealthy financial wiz, who's limo ride across town leads him to meet his destiny. Opens Aug. 17.

    That earned a big smile from the actor who's yet to reveal whether or not he actually broke things off with his girlfriend. Then again, he certainly didn't correct Stewart's assumption.

    Kristen Stewart slideshow

    "When you are young and you break up, it's powerful and it feels like the world is ending," Stewart added. This is the first time I have seen the world actually react that way. It's insanity. ... Here is my wish for you: That you get to handle your business in private, in your personal life, and I wish you all the best."

    That appeared to be Pattinson's wish for himself, too.


    "I should've talked about (my new movie) "Cosmopolis!" he joked.

    Speaking of "Cosmopolis," which Pattinson eventually had a couple of minutes to do during his talk with Stewart, the drama opens Aug. 17.

    How do you think the famously private star handled his first public interview since the scandal? Share your thoughts about Pattinson's "Daily Show" visit on our Facebook page.

     

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  • Tim Gunn: 'Project Runway' designers think show's challenges are faked

    Comedy Central

    During a Monday night interview on "The Daily Show," "Project Runway" mentor Tim Gunn explained the reason for all of the recent designer drama.

    By Ree Hines, TODAY contributor

    In just three weeks, the current season of "Project Runway" has already revealed big drama and one walk-off -- and if hints from host Heidi Klum are any indication, there's more of both to come in future episodes. So what's all of the hubbub about? According to Klum-pal and show mentor Tim Gunn, it's all about deluded designers.

    Sure, with nine past seasons of the reality TV competition to watch, the new contestants have had plenty of opportunities to see just how the show works -- from one-day designs to over-the-top challenges -- but as Gunn explained during a Monday night appearance on "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart," they just don't -- or at least, didn't -- believe it.

    "It's inconceivable to me, Jon. I say to them, 'Have you watched the show?!' And their response is 'Well, we thought you faked it,'" Gunn explained. "They think, 'Oh, we really have a week for these challenges.' 'No, you have a day. You get the challenge this morning; you're showing it on the runway for Heidi Klum tomorrow.'"

    In other words, what you see on the show is exactly what you get. And while none of the designers actually questioned Klum's authenticity, Gunn insisted she's the real deal too.


    "Heidi is impossible to fake," the veteran fashion consultant added. "She's breathtaking, isn't she?"

    Stewart was quick to agree before adding his own Klum-related tidbit.

    "Season 10 (of 'Runway'): Don't give anything away, (but) Heidi Klum gets eaten by a bear," he joked.

    Not possible, said Gunn. "Heidi could even seduce a wild bear!"

    Are you surprised that some current "Project Runway" designers thought the tough, timed challenges were faked? Share your thoughts on our Facebook page.

     

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  • Ferrell, Galifianakas and Hamm hassle Jon Stewart over 'lame' interview

    By Ree Hines, TODAY contributor

    "The Campaign" co-stars Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakas stopped by "The Daily Show" Thursday night for some promotional chit-chat, but the visit soon turned into an interview intervention for host Jon Stewart.

    It seems the funnymen just weren’t interested in the typical talk.

    "Do you have any more lame questions for us?" Ferrell asked. " 'Was it fun on the set? Was it?' Uh. 'I bet you guys seem like you get along.' "

    When Galifianakas joined in on the bashing, Stewart complained about the "two-on-one" attack, and then asked, "You want me to Hamm you?"


    "Mad Men's" Jon Hamm, carrying his very own chair, entered the studio and joined the fray. First he got an easy apology from the rowdy pair. Then he gave it some more thought.

    "Well, they had a problem with your questions, which were, admittedly, terrible, terrible questions," he said before scooting his chair over to the Ferrell-Galifianakas side. "I mean, honestly, Jon, we really have to elevate the quality of questions."

    In the face of three deadpan joksters, Stewart gave in.

    "Guys, I’ve been doing this show for a long time, and I just never thought about it like that," he said. "And I thank you, because I have been wasting people’s time for almost 15 years. … I apologize to you and the people at home, and not just for the interview I did here, but all the interviews, and the show in general."

    Jokes aside, how do you think Stewart ranks as an interviewer? Share your thoughts on our Facebook page.

     

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  • Colbert, Stewart cheer and jeer President Obama's gay marriage announcement

    By Chiderah Monde

    Comedy Central

    Jon Stewart applauded the president's recent gay marriage announcement, but struggled to find anything positive to say about North Carolina's take on the issue.

    Yesterday, President Obama became the first sitting president to speak out in favor of same-sex marriage, and the importance of the moment wasn’t lost on late-night hosts.

    "The president of the United States is gay … friendly!" Jon Stewart began Wednesday night on the “Daily Show.” And somehow, he decided, Mitt Romney deserves credit for it.

    Though Stewart (and his audience) applauded the president for the positive step towards equal rights, the host didn't have such kind words for the state of North Carolina, which just passed an amendment that bans gay marriage and more. In fact, the new amendment bans civil unions and domestic partnerships in the state for heterosexual couples, as well.

    "That’s also a step towards equality," Stewart joked. "The straight couples will now enjoy the same lack of rights that gay couples always never had."  

    Stewart then pulled out a hefty dictionary to explore the historic meaning of marriage, which isn’t a very flattering one, as it likens the tradition to a “transfer of property – such as livestock or daughters.”

    Meanwhile, on “Report,” host Stephen Colbert wasn’t as excited about the “gay-maggedon” that he claimed President Obama ignited in “pushing that rainbow button.” He suggested the president only did it with a political agenda, one he’s taking to the Democratic convention this summer in North Carolina.  But now that the state has struck down that whole marriage equality thing, which some celebrated with wedding cake, Colbert's busy celebrating the effort to defend traditional male and female body-part unions.

    “You just dream of that special day when you can find your soul mate,” a suddenly teary-eyed Colbert began, “and together you can celebrate your love of denying people their rights.”


    What Colbert loves most about North Carolina’s new amendment, he said, is that preventing people from the legal right to marry not only protects traditional straight marriage, “it also helps preserve traditional straight stereotypes of gayness.”

    And then he launched into a few colorful stereotypes of his own.

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  • Jon Stewart and Jimmy Kimmel refuse to suspend Newt Gingrich gags

    By Chiderah Monde and Ree Hines

    Comedy Central

    "Daily Show" host Jon Stewart decided deportation might just be the best send off he could imagine for former presidential hopefuls, like Newt Gingrich, who fail to go all the way.

    On Wednesday, now-former Republican presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich announced he was putting the brakes on his campaign, effectively clearing the way for Mitt Romney to lock in the Republican nomination -- though he didn't go so far as to endorse his rival. The news was well received on late-night TV.

    "Today, I am suspending the campaign," Gingrich said in a clip that aired on "The Daily Show."

    "There you have it!" host Jon Stewart cheered. "Not ending, just suspending. He's suspending it, like we all had to do to our disbelief when he thought he was going to be president."

    But it was Gingrich's next line that really inspired Stewart to imagine an unlikely future.

    "Suspending the campaign does not mean suspending citizenship," Gingrich insisted.


    "Wouldn't it be awesome though if it did mean suspending citizenship? Like if you lose a presidential primary, you're deported," Stewart pondered with a smile. "Wouldn't that be awesome?"

    A similar sentiment was shared by Stewart's fellow after-dark host, Jimmy Kimmel.

    On “Live,” Kimmel, just days after taking digs at Gingrich during the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, kept up the cracks going. This time the zingers revolved around a YouTube video Gingrich recorded to give his supporters “insider advance notice” that he would be suspending his campaign.

    In the video Gingrich, vows to continue on the road, do everything he can to defeat Obama, travel with wife Callista and be an all-round American... But it’s hard to hear the noble farewell or any of his next-step details because in Kimmel’s version of the video, Gingrich stands giving his speech while a couple of movers take apart his office in the back.  

    Maybe those rumors of his campaign running $4 million in debt are true after all.

    On Wednesday, Newt Gingrich suspended his bid for the White House, and Willie Geist bids him a fond farewell. And in other water cooler news, there's a new video of a lion behind plexiglass at a zoo really wanting to go after a human baby.

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  • Jon Stewart fires back at FOX after O'Reilly says he's going to hell

    Fox News

    On his Fox News show, "The O'Reilly Factor," Bill O'Reilly said Jon Stewart was headed for hell.

    By Ree Hines, TODAY contributor

    "Daily Show" host Jon Stewart found himself in hot water -- and maybe bound for something far, far hotter -- after he declared a mock war on Christmas.

    "A couple of nights ago, I responded to the ginned-up outrage that many Christmas celebrants feel when they are unable to celebrate Christmas at all times, in all places," Stewart told viewers on Thursday night's show.

    He then ran a clip of his call to war, which not so surprisingly, caught the attention of his TV nemesis and frequent feud partner, Bill O'Reilly.

    "Our pal Jon Stewart is following the various Christmas controversies very closely," the man Stewart dubbed "one of Santa's unusually large elves" told his "O'Reilly Factor" audience before adding, "Now, there is no question Mr. Stewart is going to hell."

    OooK. Well, even if O'Reilly wasn't totally serious about that claim -- and he did let out a little chuckle after making it -- as it turns out, the joke's still on him. Because his rival isn't exactly afraid of the flames.

    "Here's what you and your minions don't understand, O'Reilly," Stewart stated. "Your hell doesn't scare me. I make my living watching Fox News eight hours a day. I'm already in hell."

    Snap!

    Do you think O'Reilly will let the war of words drop, or should Stewart expect another jab to come his way soon? Tell us in the comments section below.

     

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